What's Going On?

Here's your introduction to post grad. depression. It's something no one talks about. The biggest secret kept by everyone around you until you come of age. For my upcoming seniors, this ones for you..

We're all guilty of wishing for things to come quicker. I wish I could slow down time. I would take that time to do things right. Skating by was always my beautiful-flaw. An oxymoron so it cancels out. My body is here but my mind is else where, far away from here or there. I've lost it, I've lost my mind. Some words are better left unspoken. But how I wish I could express the words I didn't say. I'm feeling quite regretful, I am troubled by time and how it occurs.

I graduated with a job in my field and I thought I had it all planned out. I let my guard all the way down. My forehead should have read ASSHOLE because I was completely exposed. I have no idea what I'm doing. Three months later I'm still stuck. All I see is white walls - It's like solitary confinement. I'm in the process of moving approximately 220 miles away. When you're broke and your job "can't afford you", you feel like your actions are meaningless. Nothing is perfect but I thought I did well. For a moment I was patting myself on the back. Now, I'm realizing I can't afford to fuck up, literally and figuratively.

Don't feel bad for me because I know I'll figure it out. But Never.Let.Your.Guard.Down.

Having no plan is common in fact, It's ok to have no plan. More than half the time plans don't end up how they were intended to anyway. But think things over, impulsive decisions don't always work. From my experience, they almost never work. I'm not telling you not to care but instead to take time for yourself. Hit up Europe or cruise the sea with friends. Whether you land your dream job or work at McDonalds make sure you're the one benefiting. Make sure you are happy. Do things right and know your worth, set goals and ways to achieve them.

Seniors, Enjoy your last year. I wish I had just one more semester but I'm off to the real world.

*fades into the distance*